TAKEN FOR A RIDE IN USA!

I was staying in Wilmington which is a town in the state of Delaware, USA. I was going to say it is a small town but with a population of over 70,000 people then its ten times larger than my hometown of Thurso in Caithness. In fact, I suspect the population of Caithness is smaller than that of Wilmington. Anyway, so there I was looking for the Delaware Contemporary Art Gallery. I had seen it listed on a town map and seemed easy to find from my hotel. I had forgotten where the street signs are located in the States. Right up in the sky! As the sun beat down on me, I quickly realised I was well lost. When approaching a little old lady for directions she run away which isn’t surprising I suppose but not before she shouted “ask her, ask her” whilst pointing to a car and driver nearby. I had asked probably the only person in Wilmington that couldn’t understand me although that may not be fully true.

I felt I was close to the gallery that I was looking for but trying to describe where I wanted to go to the driver of the car, I had stopped seemed confusing. I am not convinced everyone on Wilmington loves art as I do. I was offered a lift and the lady who was the driver explained that she could take me to my destination. She explained that she was a local councillor and is currently campaigning for re-election. On asking her the date of the election she explained that is would be on September 10th which is my birthday. When I mentioned this, she said that I must vote for her and if she got me to the Gallery then I of course would. Not sure if postal votes from Scotland would count though!

Whist enjoying what seemed like a free tour of the area I noticed a young girl in front of me who was my new local councillor’s daughter. She asked if she could film me on her phone as she has never met an artist from Scotland and loved my Scottish accent. I agreed of course on condition that I was deliver safely. However, after 15 minutes driving around the houses I thought we were all lost. I transpired that the daughter was going for a job interview and her quest was deemed more important than mine.

Eventually we did end up parked outside the gallery and as I leapt out the car, I wished my new friend all the best. Rushed to the main entrance of the gallery and tried the door only to find it locked. It was 10am and the gallery didn’t open until noon, so I was stuck pretending that I was going in. Reason why I was acting this way was of course that my self-appointed taxi driver was watching me carefully to make sure I was OK. I waved goodbye mouthing that I was going to wait for the gallery to open. That wait was two hours and I was in desperate need of shade. Luckily, I remembered the Delaware Children’s Museum was just a street away. Thinking this would be a good opportunity to see dolls houses and Corgis cars designed the American way with a touch of model railways maybe I set off with excitement!

On the way to the DCM as it is promoted, I was brought to a sudden stop when a car pulled up beside me. The driver wound down the window and shouted at me that she thought I was wearing cool colours and off she sped. It was just my normal attire for a Scotsman in USA, red trousers, and red shirt. My wife would say I wasn’t colour coordinated but it’s not every day one gets stopped by a fashion admirer. Wouldn’t happen in Thurso!!!!

On entering the Children’s Museum I was greeted by screaming kids running amok with invisible adults. Actually, there was a couple of grownups sitting at a desk ready to take my money. I was asked if I was on my own and when I explained yes there was an audible sigh which bounced off the walls and this included the bouncy castle. I did think why have a bouncy castle in a museum. Of course this isn’t a real museum. It’s an indoors kids’ playground. Full of climbing frames, sand pits and water chutes! I don’t think I have felt more out of place. Far far worse than the paly area in the Eastgate Shopping Centre in Inverness. Cost me $12 to feel like a weirdo!

Eventually I did return to the Delaware Art Gallery to the normality of contemporary artists and wow it is fantastic and that may or may not be the subject of another blog.