A STORY FROM AMERICA

I was staying in Wilmington, Delaware, a place I had never heard off. The reason was to attend the symposium by the American Scientific Glassblowers Society at Salem Glass Centre. salemcc.edu/glass The event finished on a Thursday and since I wasn’t leaving until Sunday I had a couple of days spare. I had heard how good the Philadelphia Museum of Art was so decided a trip there was a must. I worked out getting a train from Wilmington to Philadelphia was easy. That is if you ignore Amtrack prices which were $100 compared to $7 using SEPTA. The one-hour journey was fine and getting a taxi from the station to the museum easy. A lot easier than trying to cross the highways! Getting a taxi back was tricky as involved borrowing a museum attendants’ phone to ring a taxi company. Then where to wait? It happened that where the taxi was to pick me up was the same space which was dedicated to a local ice cream van. Twice I nearly got in private cars thinking they were taxis. The occupants of the cars soon corrected me!

The train back to Wilmington would have worked well if only it went to Wilmington. Instead, it stopped two stations away at a place called Marcus Hook. This vital information wasn’t relayed to the passengers until we all boarded and were on our merry way! I was assured a shuttle bus would be waiting at the station to take passengers on to their intended destinations. Well, it must have been invisible for as we left the train no bus in sight. I found myself in a car park where the ground was dust in 35 degrees C and struggling to work out what to do. The train driver expressed surprised there was no bus but then had to leave as he needed to move the train forward a bit in case another train went into the back of it.

I notice various people drifting off into cars as I was drifting off into a heat coma. I stopped a car to ask the driver if he was a taxi. He said yes, thankfully but had a passenger already. I asked if I could share the journey and the passenger said it was up to the driver. The driver said nothing to do with him and up to the passenger. After five minutes of back and forth I jumped into the back and breathed a sigh of relief as the air condition slapped my face.

We set off and soon was on the highway or what seemed like a racetrack as my driver swerved from lane to lane whilst trying to work out what Country I had travelled from. On telling him he said he loved my Scottish accent! Of course, I do not have one, but facts weren’t high on the agenda as we seem to drive in completely the opposite direction to where I wanted to go. My co passenger was heading way beyond where I wanted to go, and I suggested that I could be dropped off first and pay half the taxi fee. This would not happen as was explained to me whilst we passed the turn off to Wilmington. I had no idea where we were going. I had no idea how long I was to be held in this taxi and started to get a bit nervous as whether I would get back to my hotel before darkness arrived! My nerves got worse when the other passenger fell asleep and started snoring. I thought we would get lost as he will be asleep so not direct the driver. I started to talk about the wonderful countryside in a loud screaming voice and thankfully he woke up just in time to tell the driver where to leave the highway.

As we reached 90mph the taxi driver turned around to me and offered me some grapes a peach and some green leaves which I didn’t know what they were. It looked like wilted lettuce. The driver looked me straight in the eyes and encouraged me to eat this green leaves as he has experience of eating it and it works like Viagra! I suggested he slow down so I could savour the taste. At that moment, his tablet sounded, and his girlfriend appeared on the screen asking where he was. I was pleased for the distraction although I felt his eyes would be better placed on the road ahead of him. Other technical sounding noises were going off and this was his mobile telling him where the police were so he wouldn’t be caught speeding.

We found the home of my fellow passenger which was a trailer park and after dropping him off, it was just me and the taxi driver in a car driving at the speed of light, eating weird food in a strange land. I was then offered cigarettes which I declined and the driver at first didn’t light a cigarette for himself in respect of my nonsmoking habit. If he offered me a whisky, I would have downed a bottle! I said to the driver that I was happy for him to smoke. In fact, I was happy for him to do anything if only he could get me back to my hotel safely. I refuse the offer of stopping and having a coffee with him. If he told me to relax once he told me one hundred times. I still had to pay him and had no idea what the cost of this experience would be. I guessed a figure, but he shook his head I offered him more and wondered if this is what it feels like to be kidnapped?

I am pleased to say I returned to my hotel in one piece and my wallet was slightly lighter. Ironically when I went to the bar for a much-needed drink the bartender offered me a free glass of wine to apologise for poor service the day before. Best drink of the day!